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Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex--And the Truths They Reveal
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Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex--And the Truths They Reveal

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4.05  ·  Rating details ·  84 ratings  ·  14 reviews
From Out of the Binders co-founder Lux Alptraum, a controversial look at women, sex, and lying--why myths about women's deceit persist, how they came to be, and ultimately why we must trust women

When we talk about sex, we talk about women as mysterious, deceptive, and - above all - untrustworthy. Women lie about orgasms. Women lie about being virgins. Women lie about who
...more
Paperback, 256 pages
Published November 6th 2018 by Seal Press
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Jennifer
Faking orgasms, altering sexual histories, inventing boyfriends...women lie. Makeup, photo filters, push-up bras, and even Spanx are vehicles that lead to authenticity concerns against women. In Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex--And the Truths They Reveal, author Lux Alptraum discusses in detail these common falsehoods along with a variety of reasons why women feel they have little other choice.

Alptraum writes,
“We lie because it makes our day-to-day lives easier; we lie to keep ourse
...more
Harris
Nov 12, 2018 rated it really liked it
This is an exceptional book that talks about a subject that's both ubiquitous and also a little taboo: the lies that women tell. And while there're inevitably some would-be wags who would leap on this as though it somehow invalidated the idea of #believewomen, what Lux Alptraum does is dig into the why's behind the lies.

And the short answer is: in order to try to get through a world that is massively inconvenient at best and at worst, out and out hostile to women in a multitude of ways.

It's a
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Wendy Ortiz
Jan 21, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Disclaimers: Lux is a friend, and she interviewed me for this book.

REGARDLESS: this book is excellent, timely, intelligent, funny in moments, and covers so much juicy territory. I particularly appreciate that the perspectives in the book are not limited to white women (as so often happens when there are books about women, feminism, sex)—in fact, it often felt as though women of color were centered. I loved how each chapter perfectly set up the next, making the book hard to put down but also jus
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Meghan
Dec 04, 2018 rated it it was ok
Shelves: nonfiction
I was eager to read this one as it sounded right up my alley. Unfortunately, if you do a fair amount of reading around gender, sex, and harassment, there won't be anything new for you in this book.

I found myself irritated at many points throughout the book regarding Alptraum's decision to frame the book as being about women's "lies." Of course, the argument ends up being that many of the lies aren't lies at all, or that women are forced to lie by social pressures they can't control, etc. - but t
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Kales
Nov 25, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Praise! Amen! Raise your hands in hallelujah and shout it from the rooftops. What an excellent, insightful, well-researched book.

I plucked this off of libro.fm's ALC (advanced listening copies) for booksellers randomly. Truly, it was random. Because there was another audiobook that I was planning to listen to and I disliked the narrator so I switched. This one captivated me from the word go.

I wanted to talk to every woman about this book. Hell I wanted to talk to every man about this book. It c
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Stephan
Dec 09, 2018 rated it liked it
Reading this book from the male view, I changed the way I think about myself, and how men treat women in general. The author argues that women lie to keep up the proper image society has imposed on them. The lies cover how many sexual partners she has had, if she "came" or not, enduring sex to keep her partner pleased or to avoid further questions about an assault. The author examines a wide array of other topics that could help many women. Men can learn a lot from reading this book.
Kent Winward
Nov 12, 2018 rated it really liked it
This isn't so much about the lies they tell others, but how the entire social construct around sex generates lying from both genders.
Steppenwulf
Jan 04, 2019 rated it really liked it
As a male chauvinist pig, I started to read this hoping to find something to rant about. Of course I was annoyed when I found it well written and had to admit that most statements are nicely balanced. My interpretation so far is that it is about fundamental questions every human being has to deal with. For this I have to relate to another male chauvinist pig named Freud. So first question is: is society going to accept my sexuality (UberIch - Es) ? Answer: no, never. So don't hold your breath ti ...more
Rachel Matthews
Dec 14, 2018 rated it really liked it
The first chapter really sets the tone for the rest of this book. Alptraum gets stuck in straight away talking about orgasms - what they are, how they feel and why both women and men fake them.
Alptraum then goes on to fearlessly tackle topics such as the myth of the hymen, consent, sexual assault and something I'd never heard of called 'stealthing' which is the act of a man removing a condom during sex without his partner's knowledge.
After feeling slightly uncomfortable at first, I finished thi
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Russell Grant
Dec 26, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: owned
4.5/5

I've been familiar with Alptraum's work for awhile, so I was really looking forward to reading the first book. I was not disappointed. Breaking down the stereotypical and actual lies that women tell one by one, as an old guy new to woman studies books, it's quite a revelation. Straightforward and conception challenging, it's a solid recommend from me.
Rachel Hock
Nov 09, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Lux Alptraum is so f***ing smart. I knew that this book would engage me, but I was not prepared for how much it moved me.
Charlotte Render
Dec 31, 2018 rated it really liked it
I enjoyed reading this, it showed me that this stuff is everywhere and it opened my eyes a little more than they had previously been
Dan Davis
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Alan (Gmail)
Nov 28, 2018 marked it as to-read
Shelves: epub
From Out of the Binders co-founder Lux Alptraum, a controversial look at women, sex, and lying—why myths about women's deceit persist, how they came to be, and ultimately why we must trust women
When we talk about sex, we talk about women as mysterious, deceptive, and - above all - untrustworthy. Women lie about orgasms. Women lie about being virgins. Women lie about who got them pregnant, about whether they were raped, about how many people they've had sex with and what sort of experiences the
...more
Casey Darnell
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Jessica
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“When women's truths are denied, they have no recourse but to turn to a socially acceptable fiction; when the only means to achieve their ends are laced with falsehood, women embrace that means because they have to.” 0 likes
“What might the world look like if we actually believed women?” 0 likes
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